There’s an Avett Brothers song, “Head Full Of Doubt / Road Full Of Promise” that always inspires me:
“When nothing is owed or deserved or expected
And your life doesn’t change by the man that’s elected
If you’re loved by someone, you’re never rejected
Decide what to be and go be it.”
Because I’m good at a lot of things, for the longest time, my struggle was “deciding what to be.” I’m a trained lawyer. I’m an author. I do a lot of political activism. I cook. Garden. I lead and mentor. I’ve been told I’m not the world’s worst wife. 
In order to be yourself, you have to know yourself.
When I was graduating from high school at sixteen, I was asked during an aptitude test what I wanted to be “when I grow up.” My answer: A writer and a fashionista.
In South Africa in the mid-Eighties, this wasn’t an “acceptable” career choice, so, bowing to societal and family pressure, I ended up practicing law on two continents, including at Logitech and Apple Computer.
Now, more than thirty years later, it’s clear to me that my instincts back then were right. I /still/ want to be a writer and a fashionista. (Really, I just love writing the word “fashionista.” LOL)
We know ourselves. Decide what to be and go be it.
Not sure where to start? Try journaling. Make a promise to yourself to jot down at least a few things daily. “Daily” is important, because it creates a routine, and routines, whether we like it or not, become habits and good habits make life easier. Good habits make it easier to DECIDE WHAT TO BE AND GO BE IT.
In my journal, I make notes about my mood, things I’m grateful about or maybe pissed off about, successes, failures, whether I meditated, did yoga or other exercise, etc. But mostly, with the habit of daily journaling, I was able to “hear” the voices in my head, especially the negative ones who tell you you can’t be who YOU want TO BE. You know the one. Those jerks who usually speak to you in the second person. Who is this person in your head who doesn’t think they’re even part of you? That mofo jerk who holds you back from knowing, deciding, and being your best YOU? Well, I discovered and smothered mine, and YOU can too! (Read more about that here.)
Deciding what to BE is HARD, and not static, so recently I decided a hack I would try was simply to focus on the “GO BE IT” part. Through my journaling, I’ve analyzed where I spend my time, and what of those activities actually make me happy. Not the “hafta dos” or “kinda must dos” but the, I LOVE TO DO THIS AND WISH I CAN TELL EVERYONE IN THE WORLD.
What are you DOING with your TIME?
Once I realized how much of my time I spent drinking or thinking about drinking, and how little I spent on ACTUALLY writing and finishing my first book, The Ecstatic Pessimist now available on Amazon, I knew something needed to change.
So I changed.
I quit drinking in 2017 after reading This Naked Mind, and I have never, ever regretted this DECISION. Know why? Because it was MY choice. MY decision. I owned it and I made myself proud.
These days, I never think about drinking, except sometimes in a “Man, I’m so glad I quit” way because I am too busy living a complete and fulfilling life. I am too busy deciding what to be and then being it.
I want to help YOU on YOUR journey. Tell me something you’re working on, something you’d like to become and be! Change is possible, you just have to CHOOSE to change! If I can, so can YOU!
Catch me being here:
The Art of Independence: www.CarlaGericke.com
On YouTube
PS: I know the 2020 photo does not look chill, but it was literally the moment I uploaded my manuscript and I was tres excite.
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